Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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