Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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