last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize