I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
