Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
