yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
should my penis look like a turkey
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
