He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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