He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
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