Pregnant stripper...not hot.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
