Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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