Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
