Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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