New invention idea: vibrating tampons
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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