Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize