You just made me feel so damn special
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Fuck appropriateness.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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