I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
