Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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