and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Dick very happy bro
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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