Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
MIDGETS
????
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
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