she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I don't deserve a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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