I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
