I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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