One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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