Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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