the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
