i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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