Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Two words: nipple clamps
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