he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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