There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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