my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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