So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
