My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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