and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
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