I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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