We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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