ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
