I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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