SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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