Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
