The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I didn't notice because vodka
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
