Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
