I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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