we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
