sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i already hear my dad disowning me
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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