Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
