At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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