Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
