So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
is it fun? or sober?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
