this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize
