sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
