I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
